


I Come to You in Pieces (Make Me Whole)

by Kiraynn



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2003), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: M/M, Romance, Turtlecest, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-18
Updated: 2015-02-18
Packaged: 2018-03-13 13:17:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3382964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kiraynn/pseuds/Kiraynn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Valentine's Day is the holiday of the heart, and Leo's is broken.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Come to You in Pieces (Make Me Whole)

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

****

****

**"People may say no one ever died of a broken heart, but when you're suffering from one, it sure doesn't feel that way."  
― Paula Heller Garland**

 

The only illumination in the lair came from the flicker of lights from the numerous stacked televisions, casting dancing shadows against the walls. Leonardo huddled further down into the cushions, the combination of the blanket around his shoulders and the pillow between his plastron and his bent legs nearly making him disappear. He stared miserably at the screens in front of him, his thumb continuously clicking the button on the controller he held in the hope of finding a distraction. Preferably one that wasn’t about Valentine’s Day. 

It proved to be a useless desire. With the holiday that either celebrated thrilling love or stressed miserable loneliness only an hour away, it seemed as though even the late movies were nothing but tales of over-exaggerated, sappy happiness.

The bubble of solitude he had placed himself in popped as he sensed the presence behind him. His brother’s gentle essence radiated compassion, triggering Leo’s own spirit to desperately reach out for the source of comfort even as he remained curled in an almost fetal position. 

“You should be in bed, Donnie.”

“So should you, Leo.” 

Donatello came around to the front of the sofa and sat down beside his elder brother. The old, worn cushions sank beneath his weight, easing their bodies closer so that only the soft red blanket was between them. 

“Raph still out with Casey?”

“Yeah,” Leo sighed. “Maybe it’s stupid after what happened, but I can’t go to bed until I know he’s home.”

“It’s not stupid,” Donnie denied. “It’s really good that you’re still looking out for him. Even if he doesn’t appreciate it.”

Leo didn’t reply, the channels switching faster and faster as he sped up on the button. It was like riding a roller coaster; going so quickly that you could only see flashes of scenery that blended together into one big stream. Donnie laid his hand on Leo’s and eased the controller out of his grip, tossing it onto the coffee table and out of reach.

Leo’s hand remained in the air a moment, empty and useless, then flopped down onto the sofa like a dead fish. “Do you think he hates me?” he blurted out, voice muffled by the maroon fluffiness of the throw pillow he’d tucked his face into. 

“Of course not, Leo,” the olive green turtle shook his head. “You know how Raph is. He always says things he doesn’t mean.”

“It wasn’t just what he said. It was how he looked.” Leo dug the heels of his hands into his eyes like he could scrub the memory away. “I never should have told him.”

Donnie slid his arm around the other terrapin’s shoulders and tugged him closer. Leo tipped over like a fallen tree, burrowing himself against his brother’s plastron as though he could hide from the world. 

Showing such a need for consolation was not something that Leonardo allowed himself to often do. As leader he had a self-appointed need to be strong for his family both mentally and physically, but there were times that he was the one that needed to be protected and cared for. While it was almost always Raphael that jumped into the role, in his absence Donnie was more than willing to take over.

They spent the next hour in that position. The only movements were Donnie’s hands as he rubbed Leo’s shoulders and shell now and then over the blanket; a silent reminder that he was there for his brother as long as he needed him.

It was at the stroke of midnight that the stone elevator doors slid open with a soft whoosh, admitting the only missing Hamato family member into the safety of their underground home.

Though neither turtle turned to look at him, they could feel the weight of Raphael’s eyes. After a long, tense moment, the emerald turtle turned and went up the stairs without a word.

With a heavy sigh, Leo eased from Donnie’s embrace and stood up. “I guess we can all go to bed now.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Donnie asked, concerned. “We can stay up a little longer if you want.”

“I’ll be fine.” Leo smiled weakly. “I kind of want to fall into a deep hole right now. But Raph’s still my brother; we’ll get passed it.”

Donnie gave Leo’s shoulder a reassuring squeeze and wished him goodnight, then headed up the staircase to retire for the remainder of the night. Entering the first bedroom he carefully maneuvered around the mess on the floor, barely avoiding stacks of comic books, potato chip bags (some empty and some not), and plastic superhero figurines.

He finally made it passed the warzone and slipped beneath the covers to join the warm body already occupying the somewhat lumpy mattress.

“Mmph, extra peppers, please,” Mikey muttered in his sleep, wiggling closer to his mate’s side to throw an arm and leg over him. 

He was effectively pinned and not going anywhere anytime soon, but as Mikey nuzzled against the side of Donnie’s neck, he knew there was nowhere else he’d rather be. With a contented smile, Donnie laid his hand on Mikey’s forearm and closed his eyes.

Leonardo paused outside of Raph’s room for a moment, staring at the old wood they had used to construct the door as though it should have all the answers. He raised his fist to knock, hesitated, then lowered it again.

“I’m sorry…” he murmured dejectedly, then turned away to his own room.

Only to find it already occupied. Raphael was perched on the end of Leo’s bed; the few candles he’d lit casting an orange glow on his inscrutable expression. 

Raph had always been easy to read and so the fact that Leo had no idea what he was thinking made him extremely nervous. “You’re home sooner than I thought you’d be.”

“April wanted to get together with Casey early tomorrow, it being Valentine’s Day and all,” Raphael curled his lip. “Stupid holiday.”

Leo averted his eyes. “Yeah… stupid…”

Silence fell between them once more. Leo felt suffocated in the awkward feeling and knew it was his fault. For the last fifteen years he and Raphael had been best friends. They bickered all the time but when it came down to it, there was a deep connection between them that was theirs alone. Countless hours had been spent in each other’s company, no words necessary and yet it had felt like they had entire conversations. 

Raphael was his other half. The yin to his yang. His soul mate. 

After one mistake they were like strangers. So then why was Raphael even there?

“Are you jealous of Mikey and Donnie?” the emerald turtle spoke up as if reading Leo’s thoughts.

“Why would I be jealous of them?”

“They’re together and happy. Did you want that so much that you thought to settle with me?”

“Settle?” Startled by the insinuation, Leo raised his head to stare at him. Raph met his eyes evenly, still giving nothing away. “You actually think that’s what this is?”

Raph shrugged. “Seems kind of coincidental, don’t you think? They get together and suddenly you want to get with me? Just because Donnie’s warming Mikey’s bed doesn’t mean I have to warm yours.”

“I know that!” Leo insisted, angry and hurt Raph would think him so selfish. “Their relationship has nothing to do with how I feel about you!”

“No?” Clearly skeptical, Raph rose to his feet and crossed is arms. “Then what is it? Did you hit your heat cycle, Big Brother? Want to lose your virginity?”

“Don’t be crude with me, Raphael. This isn’t about sex!”

“Tell me, then. Unless you want me to keep guessing.”

“I already told you! Or were you too busy being grossed out by the thought that you didn’t pay attention?”

“I wasn’t grossed out,” the emerald turtle denied.

“Yeah, right,” Leo retorted sadly. “So then telling me I’m disgusting and then storming out was you being happy about it?”

With a flinch, Raph uncrossed his arms and rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah, well… maybe that wasn’t the best reaction. But you caught me off guard!”

“Oh, so now it’s my fault?”

“You know it is! If you hadn’t said what you said, then I wouldn’t have said what I said, and we wouldn’t be standing here saying these things!”

Leo blinked, unsure how to even respond to that. “Okay...”

Once again, awkward silence fell between them as they averted their eyes unsure of what to say.

“I just want to go to bed, okay? Please?” Leo pleaded after the minutes had ticked painfully by. “Let’s just forget this day ever happened and go back to our lives.”

He got into bed and lay on his side, his shell to Raph in the clear message to leave him alone. He listened to his brother sigh, then walk towards the door and close it with a soft click. Leo closed his eyes tight and curled into a ball, trying to fight back the tears that threatened to spill.

His eyes snapped back open and his body stiffened when the mattress dipped behind him. He’d been so sure that Raph had left he hadn’t bothered to try to sense him. But to his surprise the other turtle eased close beneath the covers, spooning him as his arm slid around to hug Leo’s waist.

“What’re you doing?” Leo sniffled.

“I don’t want to forget,” Raph’s hand slid slowly up his plastron and stopped to rest over Leo’s heart, “and I can’t just go back.”

Leo tried to pull away, only for his brother to pull them tighter together. Always the strongest physically, Raph was using it to his advantage. “Why are you doing this to me? I don’t want your pity.”

“I don’t pity you, Leo. Damn it. I love you.”

“Don’t lie. God, Raph, that’s even worse! You don’t have to do this, alright? I’ll try to get over you. I won’t make things awkward, I promise. Just please…”

“Leo, Leo stop!” Raph turned him over so they were facing each other. He cupped the leaf green turtle’s face in his hands, giving him a little shake. “Shut up and listen to me for once! I’m sorry, okay? I’m so sorry for how I acted. Like I said you just caught me off guard. I was so sure that you only wanted to get with me so you wouldn’t be alone, so I pretended that it sickened me when you said you loved me. But the truth is… you’re everything to me, Leo.”

He shifted forward, nuzzling their noses together affectionately.

“So much of how I act and the things I do are because of you. No one gets under my shell like you. No one gets me as protective as when you’re hurt, or upset. I love Master Splinter. I love Mikey and Donnie more. But I’m in love with you.”

“Raphael,” Leo surged forward, encasing his brother in a tight embrace, “I’m in love with you, too.”

Raph returned the hug just as tightly; his mouth sought out Leo’s to share their first sweet, lingering kisses.

Afterwards, as Leo was drifting to sleep with the steady beat of Raph’s strong heart beneath his ear, he smiled at his mate’s sleepy words:

“Happy Valentine’s Day.”

 

**“Sometimes, the only soul that can mend a broken heart is the one that broke it. For they are the ones holding all the pieces.”  
― Patti Roberts, The Angels Are Here**


End file.
